As I lazed around on Sunday, looking like a Rorschach ink blot from floundering under The Sunday Times and flicking my way through Style, Stella & You, I realised how futile resistance is when it comes to fashion. Androgyny, ruffles, florals, metallics and full on peacock glamour seem to be our upcoming options.
The die has been cast, the auspices have been consulted, this spring, it is time to take a new Christian name.
Rose
Rose: There is nothing second hand about this Rose. She is the Chelsea Flower show come to life. She is not quite as demure as she appears as she enjoys the occasional dalliance with Liberty and Paisley print.
Carmen: She's a fruity one all right.
She thinks nothing of ruffling up like her favourite fruit, the pineapple. Don't think for a second that she is low brow, she is descended from the Fifth Earl of Dunmore, just go gaze upon his wondrous garden folly.
Lulu
Lulu: She is a natural beauty. A living breathing hymn to Southern California. When she is not honing her earthly temple in her lemons, she is kicking back in her sweats.
Zsa Zsa
Zsa Zsa: She is a high glamour pea hen who considers breathing optional when going out for the evening. If you are a man, beware; dangerous curves ahead.
Charlie
Charlie Girl: "Kinda young, kinda now, Charlie! Kinda free, Kinda wow, Charlie!" Ah Shelley Hack's spirit has returned this season. Pull out your Le Smoking and press play on 'Dude Looks Like a Lady'.
Sheena
Sheena may have been a punk rocker or even a metal maiden. She takes her cue from past hair band lovers but she always had a bit on the side at Studio 54.
We are all a mix of types; I'm a Lulu Zsa Zsa, I hanker over that emerald green Valentino dress and a slouchy grey sweatshirt from American Apparel with equal fervour.
What about you?
So clever and spot on, Tabitha! I guess I'll be consigned to Lulu-dom this spring.
ReplyDeleteCertainly not Rose, I'd feel like a table cloth. I suppose I'd be a combination of Lulu in cashmere and Charlie with lace peeking out. Sheena scares me just a tad!!
ReplyDeleteRose Zsa Zsa Sheena. Of course. And in that order. :)
ReplyDeleteZsa Zsa Charlie with a bit of Rose or Sheena thrown in. Clearly I'm schizophrenic.
ReplyDeleteI am none of these...
ReplyDeleteI do like Zsa Zsa with her curves which I possess but alas not the glamour...
Love Lulu and the green lace Valentino Dress!
ReplyDeleteLulu Zsa Zsa Tabs and I'll throw in a tut tut tsk tsk for good measure. Dangerous Curves??? Please! Bring it.
ReplyDeletereality--Rose Charlie (with a heart over the -i :)
ReplyDeletedream--Lulu Zsa Zsa
Definitely Lulu/Zsa Zsa ~ In my real life, I'm a Lulu, but I "pinned" that green Valentino a few weeks ago and lust after it daily. Too bad I don't have another child to marry off!
ReplyDeleteI'm a Helene: Pencil skirt, tweed jacket, pearls & an Ipad. In my left hand: By day a latte, by night, champagne. Occasionally caught in lace skirt & cashmere sweatshirt.
ReplyDeleteWell they say a pineapple on the front door is a welcome sign. I think Lord Dunmore knocked it out of the water. Wonder what the neighbours said during the construction.
ReplyDeleteI'm a Lulu but I must say the simplicity of the Charlie girl's suit is divine.
oh my goodness. i LOVE that green valentino too although it is not really my style type. i'm def in love with the american apparel sweatshirt. yeah, that's me. xo
ReplyDeleteI love this post so much! I'm a total Rose. I buy so many sundresses around this time in anticipation for, well, the sun.
ReplyDeleteOh god I love that you named these things. And I was just thinking how sick to death I was of another season of trend titles and their bland descriptions from the parboiled brains in PR firms.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to steal above commenter's Helene idea and claim the Rose variant. Pencil skirts and paisley, what ho. (But of course, secretly dreaming of Lulu- or Charlie-ing it up....)
This is hilarious! I'm afraid I'm a Rose, through and through.
ReplyDeleteI look more like LuLu then and now but I sure like the orange Boden on Charlie.
ReplyDeleteI don't know who the Hell I am fashion wise anymore. x
ReplyDeleteWhy be someone else? Just ignore Mrs Danvers! You know she's trouble.
DeleteBest wishes, Pamela
I wish Carmen would embrace quality undergarments.
ReplyDeleteI suppose I'm a Zsa Zsa by body type, and I have dreams of the Lulu look, which I will never achieve because: curves. Though, I do live in the more body-hugging actual lulu items (groove pants, racerback tanks, scoop neck tanks), but what I aspire to is that very American, loose sweatshirt, relaxed beauty, thing.
ReplyDeleteI don't really embrace my Zsa Zsa-ness, though I'm getting better. I am too modest and showing off the curves just makes me feel over-exposed. Also, I conflate curves and fat in my head, and sometimes just want to hide it all. Gosh, true confessions here.
Lulu Rose all the way...but my daring, and somewhat frilly twin sister's name is Zsa Zsa, she has all the fun!
ReplyDeleteBrilliant post...why aren't you writing for Vogue?!
xo J~
I'll take the emerald green Valentino, and another Le Smoking wouldn't go amiss.
ReplyDeleteVogue is chuntering on about about Japanese cut and designers, which is ok if you're shaped like an ironing board. But back here in the real world, I long for 1950's Dior.
I think I must be a Lulu Charlie, but with the heart of Rose.
ReplyDeleteI am a Charlie, with a healthy dollop of Lulu.I love the look of some florals, but I save my Rose breakouts for bedding.
ReplyDeleteBeh. Me, I'm Charlie allright. Charlie Brown that is....
ReplyDeleteHmmm. Think I'm Muriel Bloggs (not pictured) a kind of unglamorous older woman with a hint of bag-lady.
ReplyDeleteSue
Great post. I am a Rose with hints of Lulu and Carmen. Or just call me Sybil and I will take some of all - they all appeal to me!
ReplyDeleteOh well...all Women are Beautiful...but ZSA ZSA feat Italian Monica...is Super Fabolous...Italian Curves are to die for...hahaha
ReplyDeleteand Valentino dress?... piece of Art!
No photos of Shoes?...the most important piece in a feminime Outfit...haha
by the way, do You own in Your wardorbe a pair of Shoes with jiggling bell?
...see my Art-creation...;)
Felicità
<3
We never had a winter here in Florida. Between the heat and all of the spring clothes that I have been listing in my eBay store, I am ready to look like all of those fab women.
ReplyDeleteHhmm the Earl's Pineapple folly, certainly gives a new meaning to rough end of the pineapple.
ReplyDeleteThe green Valentino is delicious, but I will probably continue being a "Grace" - black clothing and occasionally lashing out and wearing navy.
Charlie / Lulu and only because I have to remind my partner that I can work it once in a while - Zsa Zsa. That way, like her, if anything happens, I keep the houses.
ReplyDeletePAYING HOMAGE You cranked out the assignment quote then trilled off this? Brava. Charlie Boden-McQueen. Touches of Aunt Muffy on weekends. But you will never get me wear tights or socks with sandals (hear me JC and Tab's blog photo pick.)
ReplyDeleteEm, quota.
DeleteFoo, I'm none of the above. This may account for why I haven't purchased anything for spring/summer.
ReplyDeleteSweetie,please treat me to the green Valentino,my colour + covers up the strategic horrors...could do with a dash of lace around the place.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you could pop the Lulu sweater in as well,handy for doing the housework in! Ida
Lulu X Charlie; I think a more austere dress in that rose print might do,too.
ReplyDeleteCharlie, with a sigh because while I just remembered where my lovely old workhorse of a tuxedo is, I also remembered that it has shoulder pads.
ReplyDeletePleased to meet you, I'm Charlie Rose.
ReplyDeleteyou cracked me up Whitney..
DeleteI'd like to be more Zsa Zsa, but I am Lulu. And definitely NOT Rose, despite the name. ;)
ReplyDeleteWhat is going on with the cleavage in the Carmen photo?
I'm down the mine shaft today, my little pony has become a dirt smeared pit pony dreaming of green Valentino.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comments everyone, i've been reading, just haven't had time to comment.
I am Charlie Lulu but Rose and Zsa Zsa are sneaking up on me...
ReplyDeleteI hope you are feeling better.
ReplyDeleteSkinny jeans and a thin sweater for spring here.
Sheree - Oh I'm fine just working flat out, that's all.
DeleteIf I'm living in a parallel universe aka dream world, I would totally wear the floral dresses and pretend that I'm a glamorous and trendy lady. In reality, I'm more sweats and pant suit type of girl.
ReplyDeleteHm, I don't think I fit any of the above descriptions - maybe Lulu but without the yoga?
ReplyDeleteI am Char, that's another category but her clothes don't matter she is covered in an apron. In my fantasy world I am ZsaZsa, fun game Tabs!
ReplyDeleteDivorced from LuLu and married now to ZsaZsa. An excellent move if I say so.
ReplyDeleteMichael - that explains a lot.
DeleteYup
DeleteWow! I'm a mix of Lulu and Zsa-Zsa but wish I could carry off Rose some days also ;-) xx
ReplyDeleteI am Rose Lulu with a soupcon of Sheena ( love metallics) but love paisley prints more. I really can't pass a paisley print, to the extent that I actually once went to an evening lecture on the evolution of the paisley print shawl. I know, **sad**. Combine it with a floral print and I might actually spontaneously combust.
ReplyDeleteSorry not to meet up - I didn't realise you were working part time!
LA Rona- oh more like full time recently, still, can't complain.
DeleteIm Zsa Zsa ...in my dreams ..I suppose Im LuLu .. do you ever bore yourself Tabs? feel a bit like that ..
ReplyDeletesmr: Oh yes I bore myself at times, we all get that feeling, hence all the vices of the world.
DeleteI'm Lulu with no yoga, bit sometimes Rose... Fun! Love seeing all the new trends for Spring!
ReplyDeletexo
Kim
i'm a bit of a rose lulu who wishes she were cool enough to be a charlie!
ReplyDeletexox P
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI'm a Charlie at my job; very tailored, lots of menswear pieces. I was a Lulu when I was younger. But at home...probably a Maggie, after work I ditch the clothes, walk around in underwear or maybe a slip. I like to accessorize with a drink. I keep a nice silk paisley robe nearby in case the UPS man rings.
ReplyDeleteI had to delete my comment above because I spelled a word wrong, and I'm really OCD about that.
My Italian side imagines itself as Zsa Zsa, I look best as Charlie, while my real life is LuLu. However, though I may live in Southern California, I am not its living breathing hymn. :)
ReplyDeleteJW: How stunning is Monica Belluci? Sultriest woman ever.
DeleteI am Rose Lulu, but was more Charlie when I was younger. (I have to be very toned to wear Charlie, so it sneaks in and out of my wardrobe seasonally.)
ReplyDeleteUgh, I'm lost in a sea of unoriginality...and boredom. Who am I?!
ReplyDeleteFarrah, you are your own unique snowflake.
DeleteOh what a shame you didn't mention my category - Pleather Beanbag.
ReplyDeleteCybill - I must have missed that slippery gem in the mags last week.
DeleteMy problem is I can imagine myself being each and everyone. But Charlie made me pause. Like husby says, you are dressed like a little man.
ReplyDeleteTiffany - that really made me laugh!
DeleteI want to be Charlie, but Lulu is more on target.
ReplyDeleteCharlie, with a little bit of Lulu thrown in at home. I have actually been considering that Boden sweater, so that confirms it!
ReplyDeleteLove the laid back vibe of the Southern CA (Lulu). That's where I grew up and so there will always be a little of that in my attire. Not too fond of the Charlie look.. I love a good pencil skirt and blazer but that's where I draw the line. No guy suits for me:) GREAT commentary and photos! I'll be adding you to my blog roll and hopefully I will not miss as many of your posts.
ReplyDeleteHave a nice weekend!
xxL
I'm deflinetly a Lulu Sheena!
ReplyDeleteWhat fun Tabs! I'm a Lulu Rose for sure.
ReplyDeleteI will be an over-worked (happily and self-inflicted) professor of higher academia M-F: tweeds, 501's, khakis, cords, duck-boots, repp and plaid ties, brogues, polo and brethern button collar shirts, weejuns, and (occasionally) elbow patches, on the weekend 501 cut-offs, tattered Ts, filson flannels and wool sweaters and steel-toes. Just which of these names would fit me? (besides "Worked through and missed your-lunch again!", or "Damn, where'd the weekend go?").
ReplyDeleteI will be an over-worked (happily and self-inflicted) professor of higher academia M-F: tweeds, 501's, khakis, cords, duck-boots, repp and plaid ties, brogues, polo and brethern button collar shirts, weejuns, and (occasionally) elbow patches, on the weekend 501 cut-offs, tattered Ts, filson flannels and wool sweaters and steel-toes. Just which of these names would fit me? (besides "Worked through and missed your-lunch again!", or "Damn, where'd the weekend go?").
ReplyDeleteLulu. No question. I wish I were a little of the others, but let's be real. I live in jeans and tees.
ReplyDeleteLulu, but would love to be a tad more Zsa Zsa :-)
ReplyDeleteHave a lovely weekend all!
Joanna and Ludlow- I would love to be Zsa Zsa all the time too, but it will never happen, creature comforts come first.
ReplyDeleteScale Worm - you will have to make the boys version of paper dolls for me.
Okay Tabs, YOU asked for it...
Deletehttp://lifeasascaleworm.blogspot.com/2013/02/who-will-you-be-this-spring-who-will.html
Oh Tabitha!!! You make me laugh every time! LOVEd the part about being a Rorschach ink blot!! I'm one of them - just depends on the day!! :)
ReplyDeleteHave a happy weekend!
xo, Sam
I'm a LuLu/ Charlie/ Sheena hybrid but I would love to be a Zsa Zsa
ReplyDeleteI hаvе been ѕurfіng online more thаn 3 hourѕ today, but I bу no
ReplyDeletemеans ԁisсovered any іntеresting article likе youгs.
It's beautiful worth enough for me. Personally, if all website owners and bloggers made good content material as you probably did, the net might be a lot more useful than ever before.
My blog: recipes for paleo dessert
I paу a quick viѕit each day a feω
ReplyDeleteѕites and websites tо rеad artiсleѕ,
еxcept this blоg pгоvides quality bаsed pοѕts.
Here іѕ my web-ѕite; wso launch
We stumbled over hеre by a differеnt web page and thought I should checκ thіngѕ out.
ReplyDeleteΙ liκe what I see sо noω i аm
following you. Look foгward to looking over your wеb
page repeatedly.
my wеb page get cash for surveys review scam